IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO START OVER..

IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO START OVER... 

Sometimes in life we make bad, uninformed choices that lead us astray and we find ourselves engulfed with the weight of picking up it pieces. 

We often enjoy the sins of the flesh and forget that every action in life whether good or bad has consequences. 

The hardest journey I've ever had to take, was when I had to pick up the pieces from my own bad choices. 

My late teen years were by far the most difficult years of my entire life.  I began another decade having to deal with the past mistakes and choices I took in my teen years.  

It has been by far the most draining, stressful and painful decade of my life.  I never thought I'd make it this far alive and well. 

My twenties have never been a walk in the park I felt like I was carrying the whole world on my shoulders, being a single mother at 17 having to stay at home to take care of my daughter after she was diagnosed with a fatal heart condition, where do I even begin this journey I asked myself?...

It was hard, extremely hard and it was about to get even worse, while my peers were in varsity I was home for a full 3 years in and out of the hospital sleeping on the bench, sometimes on the floor just so I can be there for my daughter, that when she wakes up she could see me and find comfort in her mother.

As young as I was my situation forced me to grow up and be responsible.  I had no one to blame for falling pregnant at a early age but myself. 

I had to do something to better my situation, I had to choose whether I wanted to remain as the fallen girl who failed to live right or the fallen girl who chose not to let her setbacks in life determine her future and so I stood up boldly and took a leap of faith and decided to fight.  

I decided to fight, at  first I didn't know where to start or what to do nonetheless I took a step and entered the battle field, it was not easy at all but yet again who said life would be easy? 

I mean even Christ Himself never had it easy and so the war began at first I had to deal with my inner self the war that was within me. 

I had to deal with my pain and anger and all the bitterness that engulfed my inner most being. 

I had to make peace with the fact that the father of my child had left me and my daughter to be with another woman, like how could I have been so nieve to think we'd live happily ever after? 

This was no fairy tale it was my reality, at times I felt like I was in a horror movie and played the role of the girl who was always hunted by the killer, always on the run for cover. 

 I had my own demons I needed to  face and get rid of before they got rid of me, my mother was the engine that kept my car moving she was my pillar my rock my greatest supporter my no 1 fan, she was there for me all the way.  I am very certain that her prayers kept me alive till this day.

There were times were I was mocked and ridiculed by those I loved by my friends, family even the church and above all that my mother stayed, she stayed with me she fought with me.  

I would lay awake at night crying myself to sleep asking God when will it all end, will it ever end? and so the war became real, after dealing with my inner self I had to do something with my life.  I had already lost 4 years of my life while I was home but then again it wasn't a waste at all I was nurturing a life, a gift from God my daughter the one thing that gave me meaning into my life and so I had to see to it that I better myself so that she could have a better life.

I went to college and decided that I needed to liberate myself and get an education, bare in my mind I was now in my mid 20s and I was discouraged, that I won't make it I'm already too old my peers are graduating and here I am thinking of going to college.  

But I stood firm with my decision as hard as it was I went to college studied like my life depended on it for survival, well yet again it did I needed a qualification and I got it. I managed to get my diploma and it really didn't bother me anymore as to how long it took me to get there, what was important then was getting there and it was the most fulfilling feeling ever, this was my stepping stone to victory.

My life was now taking a good turn I was finally getting my life back together.  I managed to get a job and helped out at home gave my daughter a better education, it felt so good to be independent I enjoyed every moment of it.

During my late 20s my contract expired, I was left without a job and no means of living.  I felt I was back to square one well zero in fact, life was hard, medical bills piling up not knowing where to go or where to run too, my wish of furthering my studies to get my degree were all shattered I felt the stagnation creeping in.  I was scared for my life mostly for my daughters life. When you're a mother to a child who has a chronic illness that on it's own is a battle and without a job it is even more of a battle to fight. 

I was slowly falling apart I went to God and said to Him you didn't bring me this far to leave me "Let your Will Be Done"

Months went by and I got a call from the UK thought it was a job offer instead it was an offer to go back and further my studies, all expenses paid for and this was God! 

He made this all possible I knew it was His works as He said in His word don't worry about tomorrow, His time is always perfect. 

I'm now in my early 30s and even though it took me a whole decade to get me where I am now  I made it, it was all worth it when I reached the 30 mark I was filled with so much joy and gratitude because this was the beginning of a new decade of blessings and abundance. 

I finally graduated as a licensed Accounting Technician.  This wasonly the beginning of a new season in my life. I made a promise to myself that I will keep working my way up as God opens more doors for me.  

In 2018 I embarked on a new journey with my Partner, we co-authored our first book which we self published under our newly established media company NEW AGE WORLD OF MEDIA.  The journey has been quite amazing we have grown in business and in our craft as writers.  We have worked exceptionally well since the publication of our book. 

I am grateful to my 20s I have learnt so much of myself that I didn't know.  I realised my strengths and worked even harder on my weaknesses.  I learnt that God deals with us in different ways that our journey in life will not be same but the same God we serve will fight for us in all battles. 

This is my encouragement to you, your life might not be where you want it to be nonetheless remember that you are still not where you were a year ago. 

I know how cliché this may sound but life has no manual, no one knows what the future holds, we are all in this life thing for the very first time.  We might not navigate it in the same manner but nonetheless we must keep moving by all means. 

Take that leap of faith, wake up look in the mirror and make a clear affirmation daily, that no matter how difficult the journey may get you will conquer. 

Now as you go about your day, in your thoughts remember to apply a positive mindset. 

Go out there and conquer the world!!!!! 

belinda@newageworlmedia.co.za